Archive for the 'Red' Category


Another Crazy Cool But Worthless Hand Claw…

Hi there folks… I’m back… 😀 With another entry from the “how to get yourself killed in an armed cage match” series. Today we have an interesting hand weapon that had so much potential… but ultimately failed in implementation.

Red Spiked Hand Claws w Knuckle Guards

Red Spiked Hand Claws w Knuckle Guards

[click image to view full size]

Yes, ladies and germs, allow me to present you with this (quite descriptively) named “Red Spiked Hand Claw With Knuckle Guards”. As it’s name suggests, this is a fairly menacing looking gauntlet thingy. Yes, in fact Sinza, over at the Exotic Automatic Forums had a thread on this and we had a good laugh about it, (you can visit his site here: ) but I suppose you’ll need some more details about why we found this so humorous. Well, I’d be happy to oblige.

But first, the basics.

We have what looks to be a large leather base panel, upon which is mounted a double skull laden cast metal emblem, with an recess in the back for a small red blade, with leather tassels attached. Never been a fan of the tassels, but I guess it the little red blade could have been intended for throwing, which would make the tassels have some practical functionality. But back to the weapon.

The leather base is adorned with a set of rivets in the rear, and a row of metal rings on either edge. It is fastened at the wrist by what looks like a band of nylon webbing. Ahead of the emblem and just above the knuckles we have a set of four metal skull medallions. And just after that, is where things begin to get interesting. The front of the leather panel splits into four fingers, and proceeds into a set of four spiked knucke guards, where it is riveted in place, both top and bottom.

Each knuckle guard has a very evil looking spike protruding from the center, at right angles to the guard, and each has ring, through which the fingers fit, which serves as the front attachment point for the gauntlet. And finally, the piece d’resistance, what makes this weapon cool (and also good for a laugh) are a set od deep red blades, attached to the cast metal emblem on the back of the leather base.

Now, we get to the fun (or at least humorous) part. While this design looks good/evil, (evil is good!!) it suffers from numerous rather painful ergonomic and mechanical flaws. I’ll start with the one that had sinza and I laughing. If you go to the link with the product page below, you will see there is a disclaimer.

This disclaimer warns that the coolblades atop the metal base are attached with, get this, GLUE, and is at risk of falling off should your pet kitten so much as sneeze in your general direction while wearing it. Ok, so they didn’t exactly say that. But they might as well have. Honestly who uses glue to attach metal parts to one another? So basically, you can’t subject it to hear, impact, stresses, vigorous motion, etc. Yeah. But they assure us, it’s no big deal, when it breaks you can just fix it using stronger glue…

HELLOOOOO… How ’bout at least suggesting some JB Weld, epoxy or something there bud? More glue? Seriously, that’s just wrong…

Anyway, that is not the end to the PHAIL that is the red spiked hand claw with knuckle guards. If you are in any way familiar with my past reviews of weapons of this type I’ve mentioned how important good anchoring is. This weapon designer would totally phail Phyreblades armblade anchor 101.

Notwithstanding that this leather base is entirely too flimsy for the job it has been tasked with, and that the metal attachement points do not seem sufficently reinforced to handle any kind of stress, (assuming the blades didn’t come off first) look at where the rings for your fingers to slide into those knuckle guards are. See where they are on the fingers in the pic?

Well, If you were to actually punch something with them like that, they would want to slide backwards. Back down and between the fingers. They would not stay up where they are right now. And it looks like there’s a good inch or so of play between where they are and where they are going to end up. What does that mean? No stability. Not good. At all.

And the base is going to go all cockeyed, because the wrist strap is way too close, and isn’t adjustable for length. In fact,  in this balrogs humble opinion, this would be worthless as a practical weapon. Unless you broke off one of the blades and used it to claw your opponents eyes out.  Maybe if you’re lucky and have long hands, the spikes might stay in the right position… But I wouldnt bet on that either…

At least it looks cool. If you’re the type of superficial person for whom looks are enough..

Hey I’m just saying…

Red Spiked Geriatric Battle Drome Hand Claw with Knuckle Guards – [True Swords]


Another Red Sword… Of Death… ;)

Today I have yet another entry into what I think I’d like to call the “Hallowed Halls of the Red Sword”. Sounds catchy eh? No? OK how about the “Hallowed Swords of the Red Death” Aha! That got your attention didn’t it! No? Pffft. Whatever…

Vampire Skull Feeding Sword

Vampire Skull Feeding Sword
[view full size]

OK, I found this sword interesting for a couple of different reasons. Notwithstanding it’s faux ominous sounding name (Vampire Skull Feeding sword? OK, enough already. What is that supposed to be? What kind of monumental dork named this?) it has some unique design features that I found particularly unique and pleasing to my admittedly unorthodox eye…

The hilt is reminiscent of your average medieval European design, with a few interesting little accent twists. The sword sports a simple cross guard (simple is good) mated to a band of circular flames that adorn the top of an equally simple black grip. this, in turn is capped off by a pommel featuring a simple flared butt cap, featuring what looks like a large vampire bat (I’m guessing here) with it’s wings partially spread. Dunno what it is, but I like it.

I cannot say the same for whatever it is they decided to slap on top of the ricasso/guard. I’m guessing (from the name they gave the blade) that it is supposed to represent some sort of vampire skull. I am not particularly impressed however. These kinds of gimmicks get old real fast. Thankfully the mask (or whatever it is) is removable, and can be strapped to your pet chihuahuas face for Halloween if needed. Cause all it’s doing is covering a section of the most important part of this sword, the all important blade.

They say the blade makes the man. Or something. Whatever. In this case the blade makes the sword. The blade possesses some of the straight and narrow lines that I like to see in a sword. But more importantly, it has a very cool color scheme. It starts out at the tip being a black blade, and then at about a third of the way down the blade, transitions slowly from black into a rich deep blood red blade all the way to the hilt. Coolness!

Overall, a nice looking blade, even though I could certainly do without the rather weak attempt to appeal to the haemophage enamored demographic…

The Red Sword of Death (Yes, that’s what I’m calling it. Deal.) – [True Swords]


A Unique Fantasy Bowie…

I have always been a fan of weapons that mimic nature. But I frequently find that that most weapons designers fall into the trap of mimicry close enough to be recognizable but not close enough to look normal, and this makes the weapon look completely wrong. There are some cases however, where each detail is treated with such attention that the final result is quite convincing. Here’s an example:

Drake Fantasy Dragon Bowie

Drake Fantasy Dragon Bowie
[view full size]

Now here is a weapon with an interesting and visually striking twist. The black blade has a very deep belly and fairly sweeping curves, with a nice, well defined transition between the two curve sections of the blade. The spine of the blade also has a similarly sharp angle, as well as some rather aggressive cutouts that accentuate the point at the intersection of the blade sections.

The ricasso of this blade has a large (and, imho, unnecessary) void that flows into a polished guard sporting a set of rearward pointing fangs, like an enlarged section of a boa constrictors jaw. Presumably these might be intended to be a dragons jaw. But these are not the most striking thing about this blade. The grip is where it all comes together.

The grip is sharply curved, and covered with a multitude of well placed small red scales. the effect is beautiful. It looks strikingly natural, like an actual snake was used to make the grip. The butt cap finishes off the look with a polished, scorpion like stinger at the tail end of the handle. It all comes together to make a very intriguing weapon.

Normally I find these kinds of weapons a little too elaborate for my tastes, but every now and then I run into a few that have just the right aesthetics. And, of course, the black blade is very easy on my eyes… 🙂

Drake Fantasy Dragon Bowie – [Collectors Edge]


Yet another red dragon sword..

Not too long ago, I posted about an interesting sword, the Dragon Scimitar which had the most notable distinction of having a red blade. I was suitably impressed with it, but didn’t expect to come across any other similarly colored blades any time soon. Boy was I wrong!:

Dragons Wrath

Dragons Wrath
[view full size]

Surprise! Another red blade. Now I found this particular sword is interesting for two reasons. First, because this sword design is a nearly exact duplicate of another sword I have posted about called the Mithrodin, save for the fact that this one has a polished grip and a dragon pommel. I won’t go into the reasons why I like this design here, as I went through it pretty thoroughly in the Mithrodin post.

The second reason is that, compared to the original, the red blade is actually an improvement, perhaps even more so than a black blade might be, which is something I am actually surprised to find myself saying. I also find it interesting that so far, pretty much every single red bladed weapon I have come across, this, the Dragon Scimitar, and Zar’roc has featured some relationship with dragons, either in name or origin which, to be quite honest, is a little baffling. It’s not as if a Dragons would prefer a red sword over any other color. But I digress.

I am honestly looking forward to seeing a few more weapons with this blade treatment, though I doubt that it will be a common occurrence…

Dragons Wrath – [Red Dragon Sword Company]


A Dragon Scimitar

Today I encountered a rather unique blade:

Dragon Scimitar

Dragon Scimitar
[view full size]

 As you can see, this weapon in unique in many ways. Where to start. Ah. The business end of any bladed weapon. The blade, of course! In case your not sure what your eyes are telling you, yes, the blade is in fact colored red. A deep, deep red. becoming almost black towards the edges. This by itself is an unusual design. In fact I think the only other red bladed sword I have blogged about has been Zar’roc, from the movie Eragon. Though I have to admit it works much better better here.

As if the red treatment weren’t enough, the overall design of the blade is absolutely wicked. I’m betting this is the work of an elven swordsmith. Just love the sweeping curve of the blade. And then we have the guard. What a guard. This guard is designed with two blades, one on either sides, colored to match the blade. What’s even wilder is that it is attached magnetically, and can be removed and used as an impromptu hand weapon, thanks to some built in finger holes. Don’t know how practical it would be, but it’s crazy enough to get my vote!

Finally we have the black grip, topped off with a dragons talon butt cap. Overall, the red dragon theme has been done pretty tastefully. The only area that I thought went over the top a little bit, was the guard, which for some reason, got very poorly treated on the grip side, in order to accommodate the little removable magnet guard gimmick. Totally unnecessary. There are a lot more secure mechanical methods of doing the same thing, that would have allowed for a more seamless aesthetic. But I’ll give them an “A” for effort…

 Dragon Scimitar – [Collectors Edge]


Dungeons & Dragons & Swords, Oh My…

More movie sword mayhem, this time featuring a very interesting blade from the movie Eragon. Now in truth, this sword is of questionable darkness. However it is still interesting because it is of a rather rare color for swords. So I’m gonna go out on a limb here and present to you:

Zar’roc – The Sword Of Eragon.

Zar'roc - The sword of Eragon
[view full size]

Now obviously this beautiful sword caught my eye because of the deep red/black hue of the blade. This is a rarity. However this complement comes with the negative comment that the handle and pommel look a little toy like. Not particularly sinister. Not even close. It only barely made it into this Blog because of that killer blade… The other dark swords may yet vote it out of the realm. I just thought I’d give it a fair shake…

The Jury’s still out…

Zar’roc – The Sword Of Eragon – [Medieval Weapon Art]

September 2020

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