Ok, so I recently ran across a perplexing weapon on a sword site at which I occasionally lurk:
Now you may be looking at this and saying to yourself: “Well, it doesn’t look that perplexing…” But that’s where you are wrong. And if you decide to keep reading, I’ll tell you why.
First of all, this is supposed to be inspired by the weapon used by the character Tira, from the Soul Caliber III fighting game. Yep. She’s the half nekkid girl in the shredded green get up in the above pic. Just in case you are wondering. Uh huh. But that’s beside the point. She is holding the original Aiselne Drossel Ring Blade in her hand. Or more like hefting it above her head. Which brings us to perplexion number one. Yes. I know. “Perplexion” is not a real word. I don’t care. My blog. My dictionary. Hrrmph.
Anyhoo, perplexion one. In the game, Tira swings that thing around like an anti gravity equipped, blood fueled hula hoop of whirling death. In real life however, I doubt anyone could do much more that use it for weight lifting. And they’d probably lose an eye, a digit, perhaps even a limb, in the process. In steel, that think would have weighed a ton.
For the benefit of those of you who have never played Soul Caliber III, The link Below is a vid of Tira in her Whirling Dervish dance of death…
Certainly not the kind of thing you could swing around like a one handed bladed aerobie of mass destruction. But thanks to the magic of videogames, we have yet another impossibly large and heavy weapon wielded like the paper boy might fling the paper at the family dog barking in the front yard as he rides by. Gotta love it.
Which brings me to perplexion number 2. Notwithstanding the physical impracticalities of an over sized video game, anime or movie blade, when
ripping one off designing one for production, why take deleterious creative licenses?
More to the point, why create a blade that completely ignores one of the major defining characteristics of the original weapon? Case in point. Can you guess the size of the
rip off replica drossel ring blade in the pic above? Given the scale of the original you might think it would be about 3 or 4 feet in diameter.
But, you’d be wrong. Ya wanna know how big (or small, for that matter) it is? I’ll tell ya. It’s a measly 10 inches. 10. One. Zero. Bah! Seriously. Why do some weapons designers find it so hard to accurately duplicate an anime/movie/game sword? We certainly have the technology.
It could have/should have been built full size. If not in steel, then in carbon fiber. Or aluminum. Or fiberglass. Or plastic. Wood. Dense foam. Heavy cardboard even. Whatever. But at least make it look like the original. In spite of its obvious impracticality, it’s massive size was a big part of what made it cool. Even if it would only have hung on my wall. And they totally jacked it up. When will people learn…
OK so I just realized my rant got a little long. I apologize. It’s just that… I hate it when people do things like this… Good thing the place I found it had the good taste not to carry it any more…
Tira’s Aiselne Drossel Ring Blade – [True Swords]